I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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