oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
