nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
