nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
