It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
