i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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