i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
