i barfeds in our rink
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
high people should be assigned attendants
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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