so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
