it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
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