Only a mothe r could love this liver
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
She swung at the pinata with crutches
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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