like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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