i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
