Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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