So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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