no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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