That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
