i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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