Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
