***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
