if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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