My nipple is on Facebook.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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