No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
There r osticjed everywhere
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
