I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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