if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
