good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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