The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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