I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
