i can't believe i had my finger in that
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
