Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
