But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
it's like heaven, but drunker
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
