Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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