Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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