dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
i think my cat just said my name.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
