what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize