Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
