Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
