What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
i believe in u and ur pee
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
