I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
