Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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