Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Randomize
