How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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