as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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