i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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