Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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