So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
