If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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