even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize