you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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