I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
